Oh, it will be so bad for you, My rebellious children,
who enact a plan but not as I would have you do,
Who form an alliance contrary to My Spirit,
compounding sin, one bad choice after another.
You look to Egypt for security and help without consulting Me.
You seem to think that Pharaoh is the answer,
That Egypt will protect you from harm.
But because you cling to the earthly power of great nations,
you will be disappointed and ashamed
in the very thing you grasped – Pharaoh and Egypt…
They will be no help to you, no security or revenue for you.
You’ll be embarrassed that you ever thought they would be
And you will be shamed and disgraced for associating with them.
-Isaiah 30:1-3, 5

When I read that passage of scripture last semester as a h.e.a.r.t. student, my stomach churned, my heart raced and tears started to stream down my face. You see, for the past few weeks, God had been showing me my rebellion, my stubbornness, and my tolerance to struggles that I was trying to make okay, and I only had to read the first line for my heart to skip a beat.

I slowly began to believe that it was completely acceptable for me to succumb to these desires and live accordingly, so I did.

For months, I had been trying to find a way for it to be fine to give into my struggle with bisexuality. I would read and reread Scripture, pray, pick and choose Scripture and from whom I would get advice on the subject. I questioned everything, from whether or not the relationship being monogamous made a difference to “I only get attention from girls and I don’t get any from guys, so that should mean something, right?” What started as putting myself in situations that I knew would cause me to stumble became a belief that it was okay for me to do the things I was doing. I had given up entirely on waiting for a husband and was lying to myself that settling with a girl would give me fulfillment.

I slowly began to believe that it was completely acceptable for me to succumb to these desires and live accordingly, so I did.

When I got to h.e.a.r.t. I began to question the lies I was believing and God started to show me the deception I had been living. It happened through really small instances, really, like holding a man’s hand in my right hand and a woman’s hand in my left during prayer. and realizing that, “I want to hold a hand that’s stronger than mine”,

One day during my devotions, I read Isaiah 30:1-5 and my body reacted physically. My stomach churned, my heart raced, and tears started to stream down my face. I had been trying to make my own plans for my life and was “compounding sin, making one bad choice after another.” I had been running from the Eternal’s arms and fleeing to my Egypt because I had deceived myself into believing that Egypt was safe and would never forsake me. Just like Isaiah says, I became disappointed and ashamed in my Egypt because its safety is nothing like the safety and love I receive from the Eternal. Egypt will never compare.

What is your Egypt? What is the thing you cling to when everything seems to be falling apart? What do you run to when you don’t believe God has your best in mind? Maybe you have more than one Egypt. I know I do.

The problem with Egypt and Pharaoh is that they seem to be safe and they appear to help in difficult times, but they only last a short time and then spit you out and abandon you. We rebel and try to go our own way when we hide under our Egypt’s wings. The only thing the Father wants is to take us under His wings that do truly protect and shield us.

Identify your Egypt(s).

Call it out.

Flee from it.

Rest in the shadow of the Almighty.

Post by Bek Guess